04:00pm Apr29, 2002
Get Hosted!  Tell them the Abattoir sent you!We've moved!  Well, we're about to at least…  Abattoir.Net bids farewell to our old Host and Greetings to our new Host, ExaHost!  I encourage anyone out there who's looking for premium webhosting be it for a personal site, or a corporate site to consider ExaHost Inc.  Based in PEI, Canada. ExaHost will give you a bubbly feeling of joy and satisfaction that'll tickle you to your cockles just like when you climbed the rope in gym class…  They've had years of experience and customer service is beyond anything I've experienced with any hosting company (…no, they're not paying me to say that…)  Expect a couple minor bumps in the next few days as DNS moves over to their servers and we upload the entire Abattoir site to ExaHost.  The Abattoir BBs may miss a post or two during the switch, but I'm sure we'll all get over it.

Why did we move?  Because our old hosting company was USA based, and when I called for tech support they Boo'ed me.  I'll not be giving any Abattoir money to a country that Boo's our National Anthem, it's classless and unforgivable.  Plain and simple reason, right?  Oh yeah, I also pulled our Corporate Web account from our American hosting company…  Just my own little way of showing my disgust.


11:45am Apr28, 2002 
As it stands, a few hungry-to-get-in LAN types jumped the Rocket Launcher (…so-to-speak…) and signed up for BTM31 before they were sure they're in the clear to come.  As such, we've had a few cancellations over the past couple days so if you thought you didn't have a chance to make it in for BTM31, think again!  Get to that Sign-Up Page and slap your name in, we can still squeeze in a few.

The race for the coveted Lord Stanley's Cup continues and for Leaf's fans, it's not been a easy ride on the stomach.  (…for cryin’ out loud, Silent Bob's Habs are doing good!  What's going on?..)  Mats Sundin is out with a busted up paw, Cujo’s having issues finding his groove but Tucker's sure quick to take up the slack!  Come on over tonight for game 6 of the race for the cup at 8pm, eat wings, swear, belch and scratch yourself like a real fan.

I received an email yesterday…  Wanna’ know what it said?  It was from someone I don't know who apparently has been using the SuperFTP Web Portal regularly since MeatMan’s Big, Hard, Drive went online to gather up his game files, patches and updates.  His “complaint” was “I never get better than 50 k/sec from your Abattoir Server, if you're going to run a download site, perhaps proper bandwidth for the job would be a good thought.” *blinks* Can you believe this guy?  I wrote him back and apologized for the apparent “slow, free service” we're providing, I suggested he try FilePlanet.  He returned my email saying “I don't fair better at FilePlanet, plus they make you wait for hours to even start getting your file, there's no way I'm paying for a Personal Server, it's a rip off.”  Hmm…  Exactly how do you appease someone like this?  We're faster than FilePlanet for him, yet he's complaining that his max rape speed from our 100% free Servers never exceeds 50 k/sec…  “Jim, the staff at Abattoir.Net extends its sincere apologies to your family for having to put up with you.  Please provide me with your home address and we'll begin laying your dedicated fibre-optic Abattoir-Link first thing in the morning.  In the meantime, may we suggest you pull your head out of your ass and either thank us for giving you a free, faster, no-waiting service, or get off your cheap ‘gimmie everything for nothing’ ass and pay someone for your unreasonable needs.  Sincerely, MeatMan.”  Want to send “Jim” an email?  Take your best shot, we'll make sure he receives all your submissions, we'll even post the best on Abattoir.Net!


10:45am Apr25, 2002
We’ve broken our record here at the Abattoir for filling a BTM…  Less than 6 hours after the date for BTM31 was announced, we were full!  (…You people must really need killin’…) but the Waiting List is more or less empty, so if you want to come ‘a Fraggin’, hit that Sign-Up Page now and get your name on that list, you’ll still make it in!

We’re also pleased to show you the first photos of John (CreacH) Creaturo’s temporary pad back here in Ontario.  As it turns out, CreacH is not moving to Winnipeg now so he invited me over for a beer and we got a rare chance to see CreacH in his own habitat (…and a small habitat it is…) Sort of seems he’s been living in some small science project.

It's only a wait time of over 24 hours, stop complaining...Will wonders never cease, a brand new series of Patches have just been released for Half-Life and Counter Strike, needless to say, they’re available on the SuperFTP if you don’t want to “Wait in Line” on FilePlanet.  We’ve got the to Patch available now, and we’re working on getting the full “any version” to Patch now, but as you can see from this capture of FilePlanet, we have a 1,475 minute wait we’re working on right now (…gimmie’ life…)

The Leaf’s continue to take a pounding from the referees as game 4 takes a nasty turn after a penalty shot is called to the disbelief of anyone watching that’s not blind.  At least the American’s didn’t Boo the Canadian National Anthem again, that’s getting more press in Canada than the Middle East right now.  (…First they bomb us, then they Boo us, then their referees screw us…  I’m beginning to think Viking/Madball and Kristie are the only nice Americans I know!  Kidding of course…)  Oh, by the way, a huge Happy Birthday to Jeff (Viking/Madball) Walker today!

If you’ve not given Soldier of Fortune II a shot yet, head to MeatMan’s Big, Hard, Drive on the Abattoir Web Portal Server and grab it off the SuperFTP now, this game rocks (…even if it’s only a MP Demo with one level…) We’ll be giving it a shot at BTM31 as well, so check it out.

Took last Friday off to do a little work around the Abattoir, including fertilizing and seeding the lawn.  As such, I met up again with our “scary” Crossing Guard who was back on my corner watching my every move as I circled my lawn with the fertilizer spreader…  It turns out she talks too, she asked me “What makes the stuff fly out the bottom?  Is there a motor in there?” (…referring to the spreader I was pushing…)  Seems she doesn’t get out much.  I quickened my pace to finish the lawn, then locked myself in the house.


04:25pm Apr15, 2002
Been busy around the Abattoir the last couple weeks and the email keeps coming in asking us to post BTM31’s date, well here it is…  BTM31 “Full Metal Jacket” Edition will be held on May 4th, so get your name in fast or be left hanging!  Due to the success of Metal of Honor: Allied Assault, we'll be playing a good bout of her again at BTM31, but never fear, Quake3’s still here.  Sign-up fast and let your friends know because we're sure to fill-up fast again.

Just an FYI for all our troops who received parking tickets at BTM30, I've had extensive talks (…yelling…) with the City of Oakville’s Parking Nazis and we're happy to report that all your tickets have been “taken care of”.  This means, as instructed, do NOT pay your fines…  You're welcome, and to the poor administrator who had the pleasure of dealing with me when I called, all I can say is “you had it coming.”


10:20pm Apr02, 2002
Once again, the carnage rained down at the Abattoir as our first Two Day Frag Fest has drawn to a close.  The traditional “Thanks to all who came out” must be said, but also a big well done for everyone’s behaviour and good sportsmanship after many had endured 60 hours of playing, 1 hour of sleep.  Also a special thanks to, Homer who, in the middle of the night apparently so desperate for Frag Pills (…Those of course are M&M’s…) he slaughtered our vending machine attempting to bite the handle off, well done, Son! <SmirK!>

Congratulations to Furwink who walks with the 64Meg Pocket USB Hard Drive even though he wasn’t even there for the draw, ironic he’s the only slob who negated to pay the play fee! (…now you can be sure the draws aren’t fixed!..)  Think of the Abattoir every time you stick it in, Furwink!  (…Just riding ya, Buddy!  We know you’re good for it!..)

Congratulations to everyone who received a Parking Ticket while enjoying the festivities.  Even though the City of Oakville was contacted about our event, address faxed, contact name and number, exact co-ordinance of each car given, we still got slapped with tickets.  What can I say other than; “Oakville…  Your parking cops suck!  I want them tested for steroids.”  Regardless, if you’re the lucky owner of a Parking Ticket, if you’ve not yet done so, please be sure to scan and email me your ticket, or call me directly and I’ll give you a fax number you can send it to…  I’ve been in contact with the Oakville Parking Nazi’s and I’m seeing if there’s anything that can be done, so don’t get crazy on paying them just yet.

Without a doubt, it would have to be said that MOHAA was the game of choice at BTM30, and it was nice to see everyone in one game for an extended period, also noteworthy of course was Quake3:Arena using the Eternal MOD which CorpsE recommended trying…  If you’ve not tried this MOD, you can check their site or grab it instantly off the Abattoir SuperFTP now by going to the Main Page and clicking on the SurferDude icon in the upper-right corner, go to MeatMan’s Big, Hard, Drive and jump to the Quake3 Folder.  (…Geez, after typing all that, it doesn’t seem so “instant” anymore…  I can’t wait for our Static IP…)

Lost and Found time:
(1) One PC Power Cord. (Case Closed, Item Claimed)
I pity the person who left this item behind!  These are rare.  You only get ONE when you buy a machine and you actually left this behind.  (…come get it, it’s been placed in the box with the other 54 power cables…)
(5) CDR’s in small Spindle. (Case Closed, Item Claimed)
Wow!  Mandrake Linux on three CD’s, and the other two have Gay Porn…  Also a folded parchment sheet with song titles, not a bad collection of songs either for someone who watches Gay Porn.  I can’t wait for this caller.
(1) Purple CDR in a sleeve. (Case Open)
No doubt belongs to a doofus who’ll not get it back, including the authorization number on the back, till he returns Isis’ WinME CD he borrowed for the CAB files when he changed components.  We don’t know who (Soldier8) this person is (Soldier8) but we know he’ll call.
(1) Silver CDR Non-Branded. (Case Open)
This CDR has been given a Volume Name of “New”.  There are five folders on it, we’re not sure what it is, we don’t want to know.  If you think it’s yours, please let us know.  It was found near fHluke’s seating area.
(27) Cents in pennies. (Case Redundant)
Thanks for the tip.

Keep posted to the Abattoir LAN Minutes for BTM31’s date.  Oh yeah, the Abattoir’s SuperFTP Server will be off-line tomorrow (Wed) for upgrading.  We’re chucking another 80Gig into it.  Stop uploading Porn, this is the last hard drive I’m buying.  Hope to be back online by 6pm/ish, till then, two Game Servers, SuperFTP, and Abattoir Portals will not be answering you…  Relax, try listening to some music or something.


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